All her dreams are made of strawberry lemonade . . .

Mini whores...?

Seriously.. first of all.. i was never all too keen on the *sexy* look for Halloween.. where chicks think that Halloween is their get-out-of-jail free card for them to go prancing around like a bunch of two bit whores. Although, I'll openly admit I may have worn something unusually low cut or short for Halloween a few times. But mostly it was the imaginative and/or most gruesome/gory costumes that I took a liking to.

So... basically, how far do we push the envelope over here? Because.. isn't it a little bit of a concern when our kids start going trick-or-treating looking like hooker wannabes? Someone posted the following link in a MySpace bulletin and I wanted to share because it's pretty darn disturbing if you ask me. You be the judge of it.

Kids' costumes: Too Risque?
(click for news article)

Peace out.
& Happy Halloween.

Fuck Forever.

All our life, us girls are supposed to play this role. You're groomed into it from when you were a tiny tot. Get older, get married and pop out a few kids. Be a good wifey and mommy and just be the best you could be.. in a motherly fashion. It's hard not to fall into that already laid out train track that's chugging along forward to that predetermined destination. But lately, with all this buzzing around my ears, I find myself rethinking this so much. So much that I'm completely turned off to the whole idea of marriage. Maybe I'll change my mind later on.. but as it stands right now, I really don't care for it any more. Not because you have to. Not because you should. Not because it's the next step. Not because it's been so long and you should get on with it already. Not for any of those reasons. I'm tired of feeling guilty and ashamed for not choosing the path that others want me to choose. My path is what makes me most happy. Not you; or you; or even you. And I'll be damned if I ever marry for wrong intentions. So, you can have it all for yourself cuz... I just don't want it anymore.

*tosses bouquet*

this is halloween.. this is halloween..

You all know damn well it's my favourite time of year.. : ))
So.. in honour of the upcoming holiday.. here are two of my favourite edited photos of me from the Fix My Pic group on flickr. Seriously.. hahaha can it get more awesome than this?? i think NOT! : ))) --- i did not edit these. i just took the original shots.

ME! as a Zombie!! *mua ha ha ha* it's ridiculously creepy and insane. i love it soo much!!!!! RAWR!!!


(thank you escaner!)

and me as some wicked awsesome vampire of sorts? i have no idea.. but it's freakish.. and it looks so amazing at the same time. seriously. :))


(thank you CadenceStarr!)

K, that's about it. Hope you all have a wonderful rest of the week and get yer costumes ready! w00t w00t! :))))))

Goodbye, my hopeless dream...


I'm feeling really bummed out and disappointed about things right now. My heart aches. I'm sad about things and I wish so bad things could be different. I'm sorry for the pain people have to endure and I wish we never had to go through so many of the things we need to go through in this lifetime. It's not fair.. it's unjust.. it's so painful.. and it's just downright crummy.

Look After You

If I don't say this now I will surely break
As I'm leaving the one I want to take
Forgive the urgency but hurry up and wait
My heart has started to separate

Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
Be my baby
Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
Be my baby
I'll look after you

There now, steady love, so few come and don't go
Will you won't you, be the one I always know
When I'm losing my control, the city spins around
You're the only one who knows, you slow it down

Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
Be my baby
Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
Be my baby
I'll look after you
And I'll look after you

If ever there was a doubt
My love she leans into me
This most assuredly counts
She says most assuredly

Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
Be my baby
I'll look after you, After you
Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
Be my baby
Oh, oh, oh, oh

It's always have and never hold
You've begun to feel like home
What's mine is yours to leave or take
What's mine is yours to make your own

Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
Be my baby...

Jesus Christ.

Tempesta d'Amore

I'm obsessed with this show. :))))))))

haha I normally don't like soap operas, but I grew up watching all the Italian ones. So, I'm totally hooked on this one and it's great fun. It's been quite a long time since I've actually been into one and followed it regularly. I'm a geek. :)))

(Most Italian soaps they show here are dubbed from other languages.. mostly Spanish, Portuguese, etc.. This one is originally in German and it's called Sturm der Liebe.)

It also helps when one of the lead guys is friggen damn ass hot and way beyond cute.. way too yummeh. That would be Gregor (Cristian).. --
but really Christoff Arnold.

Maybe I'll have to go visit my uncle and his restaurant in Frankfurt afterall... ; ))))))

Anyhoo, I've wasted too much time already. Gotta go.


Workin' it..

bahaha my sister is going to kill me for posting this on here.. Anyhoo, this was us making fools out of ourselves.. as we normally do.. cuz that's how we roll. tee hee. One night, me Lu and Mari made a bunch of freakin hilarious karaoke videos.. with props! This one doesn't have any props however.. lol but.. it's still funny as heck!! hehe.. Anyhoo, check it out.. look at my bad ass (dork) self bustin a move up on her shit. hahahahahahahahahhahahahaaha

( Click HERE if video isn't working. )

i seriously need to make a video with Mari dancing/singing and play it at her wedding. I know how much she'll LOVE that... *mua ha ha ha ha* hehehe

Happy Hump Day!!!

Out into the world.

Just a quick update. So, I'm feeling a lot better. Saw my doctor on Friday and he gave me the green light to go back to school this week and back to work the following week. So, I go back to school today. I thought I'd be more excited.. but I'm feeling really overwhelmed. I missed a lot of classes and I feel as if I'll be so behind. I really hope it won't affect too much as I still have the entire year to make up for it .. but you know me.. the worrier. They couldn't figure out what exactly I had.. test after test showed nothing. All they can see now is that it's going away. So, hopefully, it'll stay away. I feel about 80% better. I have some slight aches and pains still and a bit of fatigue but other than that, I do feel loads better and I'm mostly glad that I can actually go out and about now and see my friends. :)))

The weather's starting to get chilly.. and I hate that. My bed is cozy.. and I'll be honest, I'm kinda enjoying the idea of staying under my duvet for the rest of the day.. lol .. maybe I'm a teenie bit sad that I'm leaving the comfort of my cozy bed and home.. since I've been here for a freakin month.

It's mid October.. and I have a whole lot on my plate and way too much to sort out. I might just lose my mind.. finances are a sucky thing indeed.

Have a good one.

Heaven in my mouth.

dood. haha since i've been sick.. i've been having this insane craving for Caramilk Thick... never had it? NO?? yer sooo missing out. this shit is seriously soo great. once you have this... the regular caramilk.. just won't be enough. lol.

soo.. no one's been able to find it.. it hasn't been at the drugstores.. etc. well, i finally got one yesterday.. and NOW i am content!! eeee all hail the yummies chocolate! mind you.. i must admit that it doesn't taste up to par.. cuz since i've been sick.. nothing tastes as good anymore.. *pouts*

but i'm still happy. :)))))

Wishing you all a very most fabulous Thanksgiving Weekend!

Do I want to know the answer?

I can't sleep. I'm a nervous wreck. I got a call early today from my doctor's office saying that they got my labs back and that I have to come in to see my doctor. Well.. from past experiences, I only get call backs when there's something wrong with my test results. And.. it's been quite rare. In fact.. it was only once or twice before. With me being so sick these past few weeks.. I must say, my mind's going a mile a minute and I'm terrified of what he has to tell me. Sure, it could be nothing.. or something small.. but it could be something else too.

There's no way I'm sleeping a wink tonight. My anxiety is through the roof and I'm a panic about what the doctor has to tell me about my test results. But.. at least it's an answer? ugh.... *cringes*

Thank you sooo much to everyone who has been soooo awesome and supportive and caring and just incredible. I totally love you guys so much. I couldn't get through these days without my awesome friends to listen to me bitch and whine constantly about this lameness I'm going through. You're golden. : )))) *xxxoooo*

Off to try and sleep. Tomorrow is the big day.

Wish me luck!

Week three.

Yah... so, perhaps I spoke a bit too soon? I went to see my doctor on Monday. After giving me a check up and looking at my blood results, doctors orders are that I don't return to work .. OR school for the next little while. What the fuck?

Apparently, this virus I have is pretty hardcore and it's affected everything in my body. My ears, brain, throat, limbs.. and my liver! My liver and spleen and surrounding organs have inflammation? I can't bump into people or things and I have to be careful or they can rupture and I can bleed to death or something? What the fuck? So, yah.. now I'm officially freaked out and get nervous when people get a little *bumpy* beside me.. :///

Also, my immune system seems to be shot at the moment.. so, being out and about I can easily catch any bugs and in my condition right now.. that would be very bad. So.. yah... more home time for me. Greeeeeeat.. and here i was thinking I'm starting to feel better. I know I'm not better.. cuz I don't feel ok yet... but I guess I didn't know the extent of the problem.

So, I'm gunna continue to go mental at home.. cabin fever is NOT pretty..
By all means.. call me, email me, msg me, txt me.. whatever! Something.. anything.. because.. i need all the help I can get trying to keep my sanity while being locked at home with nothing to do .. and no work or school to go to. You think it'd be heaven.. but trust me.. it is not. Ugh... maybe I'll write some more poems.. God knows i have so much shit to vent about. grrr...

Hopefully, I'll have something more positive to tell you in my next post. Have a SWELL day.. grrrrr.

much love:


Hey peoples.. well, I'm not even sure who's reading this and keeping track of my stuffs.. but hey to you. whoever you people are. (say hi sometime. it'd be nice.)

Anyhoo, I'm off to the doctors now to hopefully get my results and find out what's wrong with me.. although, to be quite honest.. i'm not that optimistic about it really.. i feel like those doctors are constantly giving people the runaround.. and i'm just frustrated.

the good news is that i'm feeling better.. but definitely not 100%. Still have muscle and joint aches and pains, bit of a stiff neck, i seem to have developed some kind of ear infection of sorts that's blocked my right ear and makes everything really loud and echoey and annoying.. and leaves me feeling incredibly dizzy when i stand up or lay down.. and i have this extreme fatigue all the time. Great. I hope to go back to school this week because I feel that I'm falling behind so much and I'm quite anxious about that.. I've emailed all my profs explaining the situation.. so, I hope everything will be alright. I'll probably return to work next week. Maybe for one or two short shifts. We'll see...

That's pretty much it. Happy first of October. You know what that means...

Thanksgiving is this coming weekend.. yummmms! and...
yup.. you guessed it.. HALLOWEEN! and you ALL know that's my favourite holiday ever!!! I've been thinking up some wicked costume ideas. We will probable have some huge party of sorts.. i will definitely keep you posted.

much love: