All her dreams are made of strawberry lemonade . . .

an entry because i was scolded.

The other day, somebody essentially gave me crap for no longer posting entries on my blogspot. Well, I apologize for that. I've honestly been so insanely busy.. plus I've been sick SO much this past winter. I couldn't figure it out for the life of me until someone explained it's cuz the girls are in daycare this year. The germ infested waters of such a place is sure to bring the strongest of us crashin to our knees.. well, at least I know it's not because my immune system has suddenly been compromised.

The truth is, there is SO much going on in my life right now... yet NOTHING is going on. You know.. I dread that question that my friends ask me everytime we catch up over coffee, dinner or drinks every few months. "What's new?"


Nothing is new. Absolutely nothing. well, yes.. some things are new to me... some things are big for me.. some things are rocking my mental and emotional state for me.. but in the grande scheme of things... i have nothing to report to the outside world that would be substantial material to classify under this "NEW" category. So, I often dread those meet-ups and reunions. So, I don't have to repeat the same, tired, worn out phrase... "nothing's new".

Oh, well, I guess I have something sort of new.. I currently have a brace on my ankle that I was fitted for at the hospital this past Friday. The doctor informed me that my injury was a little worse than a simple sprain.. and that I am not to play soccer anymore. Oh.. JOY.. oh BLISS. this is fantastic... considering i'm the captain of the team, you can imagine how IMPRESSED I am with this outcome. *insert extreme annoyed eyeroll here*. The injury is from last season. It was the end of the season when I got it.. (we played some team who were really rough & aggressive. they took out 3 of our players.. including me and my ankle. fun times). I was out for the playoffs. Figured the 7 weeks we had off in between seasons was sufficient for healing. The doctor informed me, it was not. And.. I'm the most stubborn person that I know. But.. I am no good to anyone with a fukked up ankle.. so, alas.. I had to give in and take the good doctors advice. But, I had to put my foot down at the air cast.. which she wanted me to wear instead. I disagreed and said I don't want it... mostly because they wouldn't allow me to work if I was wearing it. So, I settled for the brace.. which makes me look like I have a robo-ankle/leg. Good times. No.. not really. I have an appointment with the fracture clinic in 2 weeks to see the sports injury doctor. He tells me how bad the injury is, how long I have to wear this annoying brace and exactly when I can play soccer again. I hope it's soon. I really love playing.. :((((

So, I guess that's about as new as you're going to get in terms of information and news from my part. Fun times.

Apart from that............................. I am tremendously exhausted these days. I'm so terribly confused at the moment. I have no idea what's going, really... I am in this really intense state of confusion.. and it's draining. It seems to have overtaken me ever so effortlessly..... I don't know what to make of it. Just this feeling left in the pit of my stomach.. leaving me wondering... "I don't think this is a good idea........". But yet it is in some ways. And I'm sure I'm rambling in ways that make no sense to anyone else right now. But that's ok. And maybe it'll make sense one day. And maybe this is supposed to be happening right now. Who knows. Leave it to me to find such beauty in so much destruction and chaos.... ah....... how we love the ones that burn so bright and fierce. *sigh*

So... I guess since I really have nothing new to report.. I'll end off here. And say Hey.. I'm alive..and ok I guess. Though nothing at all is making sense to me at the moment.. but I'm hoping in time the fog will clear and I'll figure it out. I always do.

I'll end this post with a picture of my mom. She just turned 65 two weeks ago. And she's the most amazing & stunning person ever. I love my mommy the mostest and she is the best mamma anyone could ever ask for.

much love:
~G .xoxo.

p.s. here's to some mornings that are perfect. and my famous banana chocolate chip pancakes.
:)))) cheers!