This one's for you, boo.

You are scum, you are scum and I hope that you know

That the cracks in your smile are beginning to show

Now the world needs to see that it's time you should go

There's no light in your eyes and your brain is too slow

Can't believe you were once just like anyone else

Then you grew and became like the devil himself

Pray to god I can think of a kind thing to say

But I don't think I can, so fuck you anyway.

I used to love you.

You know I was the best thing that ever happened to you.
Now look at what you've lost.

I don't know why I used to love you..
I don't.. I don't.. I don't.

Set me free... Leave me be

Brunch love.

Now i can drown my pancakes in syrup forever. :)

Stop asking, you know all the reasons why

hey look... it's a post.

Hiya folks.    Lookie who's back!!   meeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!  

Does anyone even read this thing anymore? anyone? Bueller?

Well..... here i am.. Finally got my computer set up the other day and I was like.. hey man.. i got so much crap i can upload and update etc...  So, I should totally do that RIGHT NOW, right??? :))))

Well... There's a whole bunch of new stuff that has happened since I last posted.  For starters, I live on my own now for the past 4 months. Finally moved out of the parental unit.  I'm a big girl now!! :))    and today is officially a year since I've been = at my new work place.  So, it's all cooolio, yO.  Lots of new beginnings for sure.  So, I guess I'll just update with some pix and stuff.   Just a few pertinent pix with a couple of short descriptions. and hopefully you'll get a proper blog the next time. But anyway, here we go....

• this is me circa 5 months ago.  i was packing my stuff up at home and came across this old leather collar i had got custom made way back in my goth days. haha good times ;-))))

 

 

•  these are all the boxes i needed to pack.. oh yaaaaa boyyy. hehehe :))

• My new place... and finally having my babies with me!!  this is Halo and Massimo.. the two boys we rescued last year.  They were found with their litter in a plastic bag in a dumpster. People are so messed up. :((((

• My kitchen!  It's totally adorable and spacious. I love it. :))))  

• My cousin Lisa came to visit from France for two weeks back in September. Her, my aunt and uncle stayed at my parents house for two weeks and we were up to all kinds of shenanigans for two weeks.  Was fun!  Can't wait to go visit her in France next year!! :)))))

• My first hair cut in a long long time. Got a graduated a-line bob.. Though this picture was taken two months ago.. so, it's a touch longer now and grown out all blah-like now.  I'll fix it up next month and take a better picture.. with an actual camera and not my cell. :)) Maybe.....  (probably not. haaaa)

• Me and Carrie up to all kinds of shite as per usual.  That's how we roll. Titz & Bitz for life.  When we gunna start all those blog ideas, girl?? hehe :))

• Some Halloween times.   I won best costume at my work. Cuz that's how i roll.

• Close up of my ghastly face. Yep  yep.

• This is baby Bali.  He is a baby Holstein calf.   He is a rescue at Wishing Well animal sanctuary and I had the most wonderful pleasure of bottle feeding him. He was such a sweet doll.  Totally fell in love with him and those big eyes!  *swoooon*.

• Me and my girls Denise, Kerri & Tanya.   Been friends with these lovely ladies for 15 years now and i totally adore them.  Such great gals. :)

• Got to see Moist play last month! SO amazing. WHat a blast from the past.  Took me back to being 18! haha  Mind you, this was the first time i saw Moist and wasn't moshing in the pit.. or drunk.  Times have changed for sure hehe :)

• David Usher.. dood hasn't changed one bit.

• Also, got to meet the members of  'In My Coma'.  They opened up for Moist.  Totally cool peeps. and awesome band.  Just listening to their CD right now actually. You should check them out. :)

• Me and Geo posing up for some Selfies post concert. woot. NXDers 4life.

• This was that time when I played for the Argonotes last summer... the Argonauts pep band.  Me and my sister had a great time,,,even though she only fake played. haha  What a great experience. I look forward to doing it again next year.  

• Went to California again this past summer.  This time, we checked out central coast.  Stayed in Avila Beach. How heavenly it was.  I friggen love Cali.  Would totally live there. LOVE IT. 

• My girl Bethany drove down to Avila and stayed with us for the weekend...and showed us around. Was so good to hang out. Wish you lived closer, girl!!  Miss ya! .xoxo.

•  Here's a picture of my adorable Christmas tree.  Yup.> Super KAWAIIIII.     And if I don't get to post before then.. i wanna say MERRY CHRISTMAS to all of you!  HAve a wicked awesome Holiday!! :)))

 

That's pretty much all.. I'm sure there's lots more to type and tell.. but it's 1am.. and i'm hella tired and wanna crash cuz I'm a little itty bitty old lady now.  Oh ya.. my sister Franca got married in January.  I don't have a photo.. and can't seem to find any for some reason.   But her and Michelle had a lovely ceremony in Niagara Falls and we all attended and it was very touching!     So, that's pretty much it.    I hope to update a bit more and be more active with my vlog channel once i get all settled into my new place and stuff...  You'd think i'd be settled after 4 months.. but no such luck. haha  Anyoo.. That's just a quick glimpse of my life right now.   Hope to write more soon.  Take care. :))))   .
~G.  xoxo.

I wanna write  a special dedication to Zodi who passed away two months ago today.    He was such a beautiful and special boy.  We are going to miss you forever.  Such a gentle and loving soul he was.  You will forever remain in our hearts.   You were the face of sweetness, gentleness and loveliness. A great and bright light went dim that day... and the sadness that overtook our hearts was immeasurable. :(((((    Rest in Peace forever dear sweet baby boy. We love you so much.. no one more than your  momma Carolina.  *hugs*  Love you both.  .xoxo.   RIP Zodiac. 

And what do I want?

Quite frankly, I'm not really sure anymore. I'm waiting for some deep meaningful moment to happen..to start.. To appear in front of my eyes. But i have no idea what I'm looking for or waiting for. I was told by my counselor to do things that make me happy. What exactly makes me happy? I thought this would be easy and I could do this so effortlessly. But i have no idea what makes me happy. I dont know what hobbies i care for or things that really inspire me or motivate me or just make me feel jolly in general. I haven't the slightest clue what that is.. I haven't any idea what i want. And what makes me tick. And what makes ME happy. And that part..is the most startling thing for me. So, how do i find this out?

What I've learned so far..

I've learned that people like to point out your mistakes, but deny their own.
I've learned that you can comfort people all you want, but the minute you need comfort, they can barely listen to a few of your own strangled lifeless lines before they bail.
I've learned that just as easily as someone can give you their love, they can take it away from you and leave you there flailing your arms about in the deep end, drowning...
I've learned that people are selfish and at the end of the day, they only care about their own immediate best interest.
I've learned that maybe I should do the same.
I've learned that nothing is definite.. or indefinite.
I've learned that your health should always be your first priority.. and that doesn't mean a number on the scale or how toned your sweet body looks. No. I don't mean those at all.  You shouldn't either.
I've learned that being able to control my feelings is nearly impossible.
I've learned that I need to start asking for help.  Cuz I'm not that strong.
I've learned that life is very different now from how it used to be.. and that there's a serious disconnect happening between people.  It makes me sad.. and slightly afraid.
I've learned that I can't trust my own judgement.  nor yours.
I've learned that I have an affinity for the sad sad songs when I feel grief stricken.
I've learned that I'm majorly fucked up. and so are a lot of people. way more than me.
I've learned that I've always enjoyed being on my own.  Maybe there's a reason for that.
I've learned that I don't know how to be mean to someone I love. Even if they deserve it.
I've learned that a promise can always be broken in love.. along with your heart. Multiple times.
I've learned that keeping secrets makes you feel ill.
I've learned that coffee is the devil. and super bad for you. on every level.
I've learned that I seem to have a lot in common with Taylor Swift and her inclination towards emotionally dysfunctional people.
I've learned a lot of her songs.
I've learned that people lie and act horribly because of their own fears and hang ups
I've learned that I'm already bored of wanting to write a new blog entry..
I've learned that naming your plants makes it much more monumental.
I've learned that it's not all in my head.  but sometimes it is.
I've learned that I have a gift.  and I should learn more about it.
I've learned that I'm really afraid of a lot of things.
I've learned that being mindful is the only way to live.  and I'm still learning.

Yet I've learned absolutely nothing at all...

i hate seagulls

I have a friend, with whom I'd like to spend anytime I can find
With ... I like sleeping in your bed
I like knowin' what is goin' on inside your head
I like taking time and I like your mind
And I like when your hand is in mine
I like gettin' drunk on the tunes by the beach
I like pickin' strawberries
I like cream-teas
And I like reading ... ghost-stories
And my heart skips a beat everytime that we meet
It's been a while and now your smile is almost like a memory
But then you're back and I am fine 'cause you're with me
And I'm in love with you
♥

Why is Declawing still Legal in Canada??

I am against ALL types of animal cruelty.. in any shape or form.  So.. how is that one of the most inhumane things that you could ever do to an animal.. is still LEGAL in this country???  When it us mutilation and torture to your little furry baby!  This upsets me to NO ends.

For the people who have already declawed or have been thinking about it.. they probably have no idea what it really is.  It is literally the "AMPUTATION" of their last bones at the first joints!  Can you imagine someone cutting off your fingertips?? Even if they healed.. you would have pain there for the rest of your life and discomfort.  The SPCA and Humane Society and all other rescue shelters ban declawing and are 100% against it.. for obvious reasons.. because it is MUTILATION!

I feel embarrassed and sad when people from other countries look at as with horror and disgust.. knowing we allow such a barbaric procedure for our own selfish needs.   :((((

Please, if anyone is considering declawing your pet.. research it first!

Here are some very good links that you can read to be informed on such a barbaric procedure that should be illegal here in Canada as it is in most European countries and in other countries as well!

http://www.declawing.com/

STOPDECLAW.COM

Save Our Paws. com

List of vets who promote such procedures:
http://declawhallofshame.com/

info on how to get them to not scratch furniture:
http://www.declawing.com/htmls/article.htm


and a very informative good video:


watch this and then click on the link to help ban declawing in Canada!
 

SIGN THE PETITION HERE TO MAKE DECLAWING ILLEGAL IN CANADA 

 If you love your furry babies, you wouldn't even dream of torturing them with such a barbaric and horrific mutilating procedure. :(((((

Do the research.. and think again!

Make Declawing ILLEGAL in CANADA!

SIGN THE PETITION HERE TO MAKE DECLAWING ILLEGAL IN CANADA 

SIGN THE PETITION HERE TO MAKE DECLAWING ILLEGAL IN CANADA 

SIGN THE PETITION HERE TO MAKE DECLAWING ILLEGAL IN CANADA   

Cuz it's not hard to fall.. when you float like a cannonball

The crummiest of days ended with an even crummier explosion on this crummy day. :((((

My dad gave me his wedding watch today. It means a lot to me.

Happy father's day dad. I love you.

It's happening..

Yes.. That's right. What we've all been waiting for *ever soooo patiently*...

New NO DOUBT ... Soon!!! Happy birthday to meeeee!!!! ^__^

One more fucking love song, I'll be sick

I never blog anymore. I never sit at my computer anymore either.. The fact that the fans are going on it could be a reason.. Or that I don't feel like being in that office room. Who knows..

But I just discovered this new blogger app.. And that may or may not mean more blog posts.. :) we shall see.

Right now.. I'm being truly lazy in my bedroom.. But I do have a new journal thingie I bought from the the dollar store (I love it there) and hope to keep track of my overall health in it. Let's see how long that lasts..

I always seem to have a mountain of projects and ideas on the go.. And barely ever having completed any of them, I'm left feeling quite unfulfilled and unsatisfied in life. That seems to be the way i play it most days.. Trying most diligently [/lie] to break out of that mould. Let's try again, shall we?

Happy Tuesday :))))
Much love:
~G .xoxo.

it's too late.. we're undone

even if the skies get rough....... :) ♥

{ I'm still lookin' up... }

First Skate & 3 years passed

Me and my sister took the girls for their first skate yesterday at the same arena that we, ourselves, skated at while growing up. It was the cutest thing ever and I am SO thrilled they did so well!! awwwww :))))) my lovelies! Now the skating ritual is passed down to the next generation. It makes me so so happy and pleased. :)))))

I don't like to post pix of them, but I just had to post these because I'm so proud of how well they did and they looked SOOOO damn adorable and sweet. Mind you.. my back is SURE paying it hardcore today.. lol 2 hours bent over the ice is pure hell on your back.. thank GOD for Robaxecet!!!! hehehe :)))) Watch out people.. .here are the next women's Canadian Hockey team members!!!! RAWR!!!! hahahahaha







P.S. I would like to say that today is the 3rd year anniversary of my dear cousin Giacomo's death. There isn't a moment's time when I don't think about you Giacomo. You're always missed... you're one in a million and you're a bright and shining star in my sky forever.




i miss you soooo much :'((((((((((

Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground

Regrets collect like old friends
Here to relive your darkest moments
I can see no way, I can see no way
And all of the ghouls come out to play

And every demon wants his pound of flesh
But I like to keep some things to myself
I like to keep my issues strong
It's always darkest before the dawn

And I've been a fool and I've been blind
I can never leave the past behind
I can see no way, I can see no way
I'm always dragging that horse around

All of these questions, such a mournful sound
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground
So I like to keep my issues strong
But it's always darkest before the dawn

Shake it up, shake it out, shake it up, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it up, shake it out, shake it up, shake it out, ooh woaaaah

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

I am done with my graceless heart
So tonight I'm gonna cut it out and then restart
Cause I like to keep my issues strong
It's always darkest before the dawn

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
And given half the chance would I take any of it back
It's a fine romance but it's left me so undone
It's always darkest before the dawn

Oh woah, oh woah...

And I'm damned if I do and I'm damned if I don't
So here's to drinks in the dark at the end of my road
And I'm ready to suffer and I'm ready to hope
It's a shot in the dark and right at my throat
Cause looking for heaven, for the devil in me
Looking for heaven, for the devil in me
Well what the hell I'm gonna let it happen to me

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

i don't have much to write. just didn't get a chance.. and wanted to wish everyone many many well wishes and the bestest of luck and amazingness for the brand spankin' new year of 2012!! good vibes all around to everybody! :)))) .xoxo.



p.s. i bought a webcam! haaa it's my first one i bought on my own. haven't used one in YEARS!
and this one SUCKS! hehehe but it was cheap.. cheap is GOOD!
and now i can skype on my PC. what what!! :))) .much love. ^__^

NEW NEW NEW

it's meeeeeeeee! and all seems to be fine and dandy in the world that is giusi.
6 months has gone by with the most lovely person by my side. love is a beautiful thing indeed.

so... since this year seems to be coming to an end, i'd like to end it off with things i need more of in my life. So here's my list........................... hold on tight!!! ^__^

{ -- Giusi's Top 10 List -- }
.: of what she needs more of in her already fruitful life :.

1. BLOGGING: Yes..yes.. i say it over and over again that I suck at keeping up with my blog. I'm mostly busy all the time. But seeing as my path is going to change yet again.. i think i'm going to need more organization in my life.. with all the chaos around me constantly.. i need some consistency of things i love to do. and this is one of them. w00t w00t.

speaking of which.. i'd like to shoutout my new favourite blog Hawaii Kawaii Blog ... it has super duper amazingness explosion ALL the time.. and it's most adorable and lovely. I'm in love with it's cuteness galore!! ^__^

and of course... and old favourite.. the cute institute.. never fails to impress with it's uber kawaii vectors and great stuffs. be sure to check them both out and favourite them!!

2. FOTO TAKING: My foto taking skillz seems to be limited cell fone snaps and instagrams as of late. a very limited and cheating method if you ask me. I hope to take more time in my new year to focus on photography as i used to. I barely take pix of myself anymore either.. lol what's up with that?? hahaha my poor Flickr has been neglected so much in the last few months. It's time to get snapping again and photoshopping. I miss my cool edits... which brings me to my second edition of a 365. Which I am unsure when i will resume.. I'm currently working on scrapbooking my first one. I'm not even a quarter of the way done. 365 pix is a lot to get through.. i'm barely up to foto #30! hahaha lazy bones that i am. but hey.. i will get there.. slowly but surely!!! :D



3. HEALTHY HABITS: I've reached a totally yucky point in my life in terms of health and how i feel and look etc.. last year I injured my ankle badly in soccer (football)... and well, ever since then.. it's never been the same. It's in constant pain.. I can no longer exercise or walk for long or anything. I'm not sure what to dealio is.. and it's undoubtedly my own fault for leaving the injury alone thinking it was just a mild sprain and going off gallivanting in New York city.. walking 8 hour days from upper manhattan to Greenwich village & Soho.. and then re-registering to soccer whilst it was still completely effed up. Good job girl! needless to say.. my ankle is totally FUBAR right now. and with that.. came yuckie emotions and all those lovely girly things we get... which in turn meant i put on a whole whack load of weight. which sucks. A LOT!!! so, i'm determind to change that and get back to the part i was this time this year.. which was pretty alright! and maybe even better. But it's a hard thing to do with the pain of my ankle.. hopefully, leaving my job will help a bundle.. as I'm sure it added to the wreckage of my injury.. but we'll see. it shall be amazing once again.. or close to it. I can't wait to become a healthier more in tune me. Right now I'm consulting with a naturopathic nutritionist to aide in my journey to inner wholesomeness. wish me LUCK!!! :))))))

4. INK: yesssssssss I need more INK in my life. hahahaha I have a whole series of tattoos I need to get sooon. I've been waiting on forever! THere are two that i have drawn out myself that I have been waiting on.. and i'm going to get one this month I've decided. Waiting forever is just nonsense. and i've waited a long time already. It's been 3 years since my last one. Time for new lovely ink on me. ANd POOOOOO to the people who have anything negative to say about it. Suck it. I govern my own body. You govern yours.


5. HARAJUKU LOVERS BAG: I've been dying to get a Harajuku lovers bag forever... and a super cute one.. the knock off one i own from Pacific Mall is cute.. but not enough. I want a real one. NOW. lol and i'm SOOO upset that when I went to Macy's in the US last weekend they weren't even CARRYING THEM! what is UP with that?? darn it all to HELL man! anyhoo.. i have my sights set on this particular one that i wanted from the start... hope i get it. ;)))



6. FRUITS & VEGGIES: hahaha you'd think being a vegetarian would mean i eat plenty of these.. but believe me when i say.. IT's a MYTH!!! lol... i'm probably more of a CARBATARIAN than anything else. ... ( i swear it's CUZ OF my ITALIAN roooots.. i lubbb my pasta and breads!! nom nom nom!!) which is totally bad bad bad for you. Let me make that clear.. not to say that carbs are bad for you.. cuz they're totally not.. and you need your 6-8 servings of whole grains per day! but most of us aren't even getting the good kinds of whole grains you should be having. like all those white breads and crusty breads.. mostly bad for you.. the wheat has been so processed and bleached..and the more refinery done to our wheat and such.. the worse for you. SO.. i need to curb my delicious starchy foods.. and opt for healthier ones.. and include WAY WAY more fruits in my life. I'm fruit deprived in a major way. i know.. horrible. *sad face*... so i'm gunna stuff my face with a billion apples and pears and such this new year. i PROMISE!! hehehe :))))))) i guess my title of *fruitful* life is a LIE isn't it?? Haaaa i'm so funnny.... *eyeroll*...

7. VACATIONS: oh yaaaaaaaah boy!!! I know i went to Myrtle beach this summer.. but it wasn't much of a vacation cuz i felt like we were arguing all week.. family trips can get a little tense like that sometimes.. hehehe so, hopefully me and my boo can plan something totally rad and amazing for the new year. but we'll seeeeeee... in the meantime.. i'm planning a california Trip to go visit my TOTALLY rad and Amazing friend Miss Puss whom i ADORE like MAD! cuz she's so totally wicked and awesome and a truly special and fantastical person!! i swear! since she already made the trek here (and in the SNOWWWWWWW TOO!) i'm gunna cart my ass over there.. cuz i've been dying to go to cali forever! my other friend who lives in San Diego may get a mini visit too.. we shall see. She may come up to see me though. but anyhoo.. VACATIONS ARE IN MY NEAR FUTURE!! yippeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! ^__^



8. MORE CONCERTS: I'm actually super duper insanely jealous and sad that a certain someone is at some concert right now with TAKING BACK SUNDAY, BUSH and SUBLIME!!!!! and i'm NOT!! and they don't even LIKE THESE BANDS!!!! *HMPH*... the sweet words "i wish you were here with me" isn't very comforting at the moment... waaaaaaaaaaah!!! so cryin on the inside.. and the OUTSIDE even!! i'm jealous of you. a lot. a lot a lot. not only do i not get to see you for an ENTIRE WEEK.. but you have to rub it in and go watch all these flippin bands i adore. THANKS A BUNCH baby! *GRRRRRRRRRRRRR* so.. with that said.. i definitely plan on seeing more shows this year.. cuz i'm jonzin hardcore for music and live shows. I saw Taking Back Sunday already this year.. so i don't feel totally horrible about it. I love them a lot... :))) but i'm scanning ticketmaster constantly for BUSH to come to TOronto. HURRY UP! the kills have a show in the new year. i'd love to go see them. they are pretty amazing! :))))) let's see what else is out there for me!! yay MUSIC! yay BANDS! yay ya YA YA YAYA!!!!!

9. SYMPHONY: soooooooooo.. this lady at my work says that she volunteers for the toronto symphony all the time.. and they always look for people.. i'm totally into the idea of doing this! i'm looking into it as we speak and getting some extra funds to repair my poor clarinet *sad face* that broke during my last year in wind symphony at YOrk U. waaah! the poor lill thing..... once i get it all fixored up, i'm gunna practice a shitload and email all these places in Toronto and see what i can do. the feeling of playing in an ensemble is incomparable.. trust ME! it is the most fulfilling feeling ever.. and it's so beautiful and vibrant and i cannot wait to be part of that again. so..i really sincerely hope to get going towards that soon soon SOON! :))))

10. BORING HAIR: actually.. this is what i'm gunna "need" in the new year.. but DON'T want.. :((((((((((((( and i'm dreading it a lot.. so, i'm gunna have super insane hair for the next few weeks to get it out of my system. Seeing as I'm gunna have to start interviewing for some job positions in the new year, I'm totally gunna need grown-up boring hair.. and that makes me super duper sad.. you have NO idea!!! i have like semi shaved punky hair with all kinds of pink and rad colours all over it for the past little while.. and to know i have to get rid of all that to find myself a job makes me very tearful and sad. Stupid world and it's conformists. You suck the bag! a lot.. :(((((((((((((((((((((((((


sooooooooooooooooo... there you have it. My lovely list of things i need in the new year. of fabulouslessness (and no so fabuloussness..) but hey. dems the breaks. I'm happy to write new stuffs. and i wish very merry love to everyone. I can't believe it's already December! wowwieee! Happy end of the year to ALL! Be good for SANTA! and mostly for you!

much love:
~Giusi .xoxo.

Anything at all...

one look
from you
i drift
away
i pray
that you
are here
to stay

anything you want
you got it
anything you need
you got it
anything at all
you got it
baby...
♥